omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
Went to the doctors. She saw my " I love beer" tattoo. All she said was " My drunken tat is of just one word. "Cornnuts.". Then said Mexico was "awesome." And sent me on my way. Yeah. She's my favorite doctor.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize