I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
Randomize
