Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
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