It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
