YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
one might say we're banned from that church
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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