walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize