we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
