You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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