Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Don't tell me you're on acid again
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
