11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Randomize
