It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
Randomize
