Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
