you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
Randomize
