see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
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