hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
This gyro tastes like lonliness
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
