you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
