I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
Randomize
