That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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