i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
