we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
