Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Randomize
