I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Randomize
