worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
Randomize
