And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
