i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Randomize
