Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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