i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
