why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
just tell him i said nine months
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize
