The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize
