is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Randomize
