I think scott just propositioned me for sex
They totally botched my boob job. My tits look like they're are winking.
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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