Hey man sorry I got all grabby
I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
Randomize
