Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
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