Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
