My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
