too bad you live with your parents still
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
where are you?
Hypothermia
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
Randomize
