What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
As shirtless as possible
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize
