I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Randomize
