U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
nutella sex= disaster
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
Randomize
