I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
You ate ashes out of my bong
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
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