She's JV to your varsity
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Randomize
