The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
