HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
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