you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
