so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Randomize
