Well apparently he's into motor boating.
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
Randomize
