great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
