You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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