whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Randomize
