Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
Randomize
